Zombieland Survival Rules for Investors

As I’ve said before, I love Zombie movies. I even like the funny stuff like Zombieland. I ordered the movie for only six bucks from Amazon last week. One of the unique things about this particular zombie movie is the main character, Columbus (none of the characters use their real names, just where they are from or where they are going) has a set of survival rules for the Zombie Apocalypse. This rules are flashed on the screen when they are applicable.

It’s too bad as investors, the rules don’t flash on the screen before we make mistakes. So when a few of these rules were ambiguous enough to write a zombie article that I could relate back to investing….well, you know I couldn’t resist!

So here are a few rules that I wish would flash on the screen for investors before they invest.
Rule #4 Don’t be a hero. In Zombieland as well as investing it means don’t take unnecessary risks. My philosophy on risk has always been, take as little as possible while still achieving the goal. There is no point in getting better returns just for the sake of making more money, it’s not worth the risk. Don’t be a hero.

Rule #5 No Attachments. In the movie it meant don’t get close to anyone. In investing, don’t get too attached to or fall in love with an investment. It will cloud your judgement when it is time to sell. No attachments.
Rule #8 Get a KickAss Partner. Woody Harrelson plays Columbus’ partner Tallahassee. He’s a crazy, revenge-seeking zombie killer. In investing you need a partner, an advisor, that will be diligent and get you to implement what’s necessary for your financial survival. Never underestimate the value of a good kickass financial advisor.

Rule #22 When in doubt, know your way out. In the movie it means have a backup plan, anticipate danger and know how to get out of the situation. With investments, you must have a similar plan. Know why you own each security and have a discipline to get out when there is too much risk or danger. Consider using an Investment Policy Statement or stop loss orders. Know your way out.|

Rule #32 Enjoy the little things. In the movie and in investing it means don’t sweat the small stuff! Believe me, there is plenty of small stuff. Investments go down, sometimes you lose money. Keep focused on why you are investing in the first place. Take pleasure in the fact that this won’t be your last investment and you will reach your goals. Enjoy the little things.

What’s funny is that lately I’m finding these investing rules in every movie I watch. Stay tuned for investment disciplines from Gollum of Lord of The Rings next. I’m kidding!

As goofy as this post sounds at first, each one of these rules should be practiced. If you know you need some financial survival skills, write me at david@lexwealth.com, or call me at (859) 225-2596.